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Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Deliver us from Akpan...

AKPAN bought a new mobile phone. He sent a message to everyone on his phone book.

The message reads:

My mobile number has changed; earlier it was Nokia 3310, now it is Nokia 6610. Please take note..

In a conversation:

AKPAN : I am proud because my son is in Medical College
Friend: Really? What is he studying?

AKPAN: No, he is not studying, they are studying him.

Akpan visits his Doctor :

AKPAN: Doctor, in my dreams I play football every night.
DOCTOR: Take these drugs and you will be okay.
AKPAN: Can I take it tomorrow? Tonight is the final game.

Akpan and his wife :
AKPAN: If 2mrow I die, will you remarry?
Wife: No! I will stay with my sister but if I die will you remarry?
AKPAN: No, I will also stay with your sister.

AKPAN: People consider me as a “GOD”
Wife: How do you know?
AKPAN: When I went to the park today, everybody said, oh GOD, you have come again.

AKPAN comes back to his car and finds a note saying “parking fine”
He writes a note and sticks it to a pole “Thanks for the compliment”

How do you recognize Akpan in school?
He is the one who erases the notes from his book when the teacher erases the board.

Once AKPAN was walking, he had a glove in one hand and none on the other hand. So a man asked him why he did so. He replied: The weather forecast announced that on one hand, it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.

AKPAN: Why are all these people running?
Man: This is a race; the winner will get the cup.
AKPAN: If only the winner will get the Cup, why are the others running?

In a classroom:

Teacher: “I killed a person. Convert this sentence into future tense”
AKPAN: The future tense is “You will go to jail”.

AKPAN told his servant: “Go and water the plants!”
Servant: “It is already raining”
AKPAN: “So what? Take an umbrella and go”

Personally, I think Akpan is smart, his foolishness shows he still has a brain. lmao!

17 comments:

olusimeon said...

llllllloolllll..
rotf..and i'm not laffin at akpan..i'm laffin at manda..lol..

Original Mgbeke said...

LMAOOO, this was quite a funny read. Akpan oooo.

histreasure said...

that was one funny post but emmmm,why did it have to be Akpan now, you de diss my town boy o..lol

'twas heeelarious

Myne said...

That's a very funny joke, always makes me laugh.

I saw a new name around the place and came to say welcome. Guess it's welcome back. Hope to see more of you.

Bibi said...

LKWMD!!! that is funny as hell! I JUST CALLED MY FRIEND TO READ. we're laffing like hyenas. very funny. lol

Manda said...

lmao, thanx guys... guess i nid to update... Cant believe it's back to blogville.

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

hahaha.

btw, Happy 2010 to you and yours!

NIGERIAN CURIOSITY
IT WAS SO MUCH EASIER WHEN I ONLY HAD ONE...

Chris Ogunlowo said...

Very funny.

Happy New Year O!

Mustafali said...

All of them are so funny. Akpan's sense of humour is very good. I liked it. He made me put a big smile on my fice. :)

chumly said...

Akpan sounds like a very happy person.

Damaris said...

hahahaha that's really funny :))

DaftNotStupid said...

Akpan is my kind of guy.

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Classic said...

This is so very funny...Lol... Akpan has a good hold on life.

Amy said...

I appreciate your PO very much the picture with the article. Continues to refuel!!

olusimeon said...

hi manda. ..where are you..?
pls mail me ..simeoneomobaba@gmail.com
cheers